It’s Shell. I’m a 35 year old girl, soon to be an old lady, judging by the tricks time has been playing on me.
Everything changes and this page might need an annual update, but, fortunately, there’s one thing I’ll always be: Their mother.
You see… before they came, I was this whole other person. I enjoyed webdesign – for fun – and watching movies. Several. Preferably, in a row.
This one time, my mom and I stood up all night and watched 7 movies.
I am basically what my mom made me. The good and the bad. She’s a persuasive young lady.
She thought that if I studied enough I could accomplish her dream to live in North America. So, I did.
I studied Architecture and Mechanical Engineering. The second university I had to drop. I had this big plan of using the knowledge I thought I’d gain to research on alternative forms of energy. That would have been fun.
I also studied English excessively and by myself (hence the gramatical and spelling errors) and I’m very proud of that, if I may mention. If I hadn’t done it, I wouldn’t be in Canada now. It was kind of mandatory.
At one point of my life I actually taught English to Children.
There was this one girl in class who would always sit on my lap and hug me, even though I’d tell her repeatedly not to. I remember wanting a child so much, specially when she did that, that something inside me hurt. My heart, probably.
Finally, when I was 31 I got pregnant and when I was 11 weeks pregnant, I found out I was having twins. At 26 weeks we found out we were having twin girls.
The first year is a blur. No sleep, no tooth-brushing, no-nothing.
When the girls were 11 months old we got accepted under the Federal Skilled Worker program, which would allow us to immigrate to Canada.
I tend to romantize things and even my happiness might sound a bit melancholic. It’s not that I’m sad, you see… it’s just that I’m touched. Overly touched by the smallest things. For I believe they are the biggest.
It doesn’t matter what I’m doing. I’ll always break down in tears when the snow falls. I’ve wished for it for a long, long time.
Sometimes I won’t make sense to you. It’s probably because, even though I might be looking at what you’re looking… I’ll rarely be seeing what you’re seeing.
Thank you for stopping by.
– Mom Shell