Please, don’t cry

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It’s 4.10am and she just stopped crying. She had been crying since a little past 3:00am.

I don’t know what’s wrong with her. I’ve tried giving her a bottle, but if I so much to turn her around, instead of holding her tight, the crying gets worse.

We’ve tried distracting her with all the things we use when she’s normally crying, but she wasn’t interested on anything.

We put Frozen on and I started singing. Whenever I stopped singing, she would start crying again. It’s like she couldn’t see us, only listen to me …and feel me holding her.

As I watched the tears going down her cheek I thought of her smile. She’s such a happy, loving baby. I love that smile and the little noise she makes when we find her hiding behind the curtains.

I’m pretty sure she’s hungry because she didn’t take her bottle after dinner like she always does, but she won’t take her bottle. I want to feed her, but I’m afraid she’ll start crying again, she has just calmed down.

It’s neither the first nor the second time this’s happened. It had been a while, though. She wakes us desperate and acts like she can’t see us. Like she’s still sleeping. When I was breastfeeding I’d put her on my chest and she’d calm down. But now, I simply don’t know what to do.

The doctor says it could be night terror.

I think he’s right. It is night time and this IS terrifying. I’ve brought her to the living room so she wouldn’t wake up her sister, who is,  magically, still sleep, even though I’m pretty sure the whole building is up from hearing her crying,

I wonder if she’ll continue to have these episodes when she’s older and tell me what this was all about.

She’s sobbing a little on her sleep, so, I’m staring at her. I cannot leave her alone right now, doesn’t matter how hard I need to pee.

Too much information?

I’m sorry about that

Good night…

Half asleep,

Shelly

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